I run for...my sanity.

8/30/13 - 5.30mi at 11:47 min/mi

9/02/13 - SICK
9/04/13 - SICK
9/07/13 - 6.27mi at 12:15 min/mi

As you can see from my weekly summary, I have been down and out for the last several runs. My body forced me to take a much needed break from running. My body recharged. My mind…did not. After going on 2 years of regular running/training, I can tell a BIG difference in my attitude and my mood whenever I don't run for a week. My tolerance for stress goes way down, irritability goes up, and I slowly start to withdrawal from the outside world.

September is National Recovery Month for those with behavioral health conditions - this includes substance use and mental health disorders. I felt it appropriate to write this blog post this month in honor of National Recovery Month and as such, I will be doing a little self-disclosure. One of the reasons that I run, as the title of today's blog post suggests, is for my sanity. Because guess what….running is cheaper than therapy. :)

There was a time in the not so distant past when I struggled with depression, anxiety, and substance use problems. Not a lot of people know this because I kept it a secret from almost everyone I knew. The guilt and shame I felt inside was eating me alive. I had completely lost who I was as a person. Inevitably, like most secrets, the truth had to come out sometime. This was all happening the year I should have been graduating from college. But because of everything I was going through, I ultimately failed an entire year of school. My family started to put the pressure on me about graduation. That's when I had to break down and tell them the truth. Although it was the scariest and hardest thing I've ever done, it was also the best thing for me at the time. And I was incredibly lucky to have such a supportive family. What I thought would be met with hatred and disdain was instead met with much sympathy and concern. I'm going to be completely honest. I was to a point where I knew I couldn't get out of "this" alone. I needed therapy and medication for a brief time until I gained enough confidence and strength to face my problems on my own. Even after therapy and medication, it took me probably 2 years to really feel like myself again.

So even though I'm back, so to speak, my old struggles creep in from time to time. Thankfully I have a lot of healthy coping skills under my belt but nothing has been as effective as running! Running not only helps get rid of stress, anxiety, depression, loneliness, anger, low self-esteem, etc., it also helps to PREVENT it. When I run regularly, at least 3x a week, I find that I can cope with anything. In fact, I welcome life's challenges! Challenges are nothing more than opportunities to succeed. (The old me would have viewed them as automatic failures.)

So my message today is pretty straightforward. If you find yourself in a place where I used to be, there is no shame in letting someone in on your secret and getting the help you need. Or maybe you just find yourself a little stressed out from time to time. Try RUNNING! It really is great therapy for your whole being - mind, body & soul.

For more information and resources on National Recovery Month go to: www.samhsa.gov